Does anyone else remember that show Blossom?  Well Mayim Bialik (Blossom herself) is fat and can’t dress so she’s getting a make-over.  The child star  has-been agreed to appear on the show ‘What Not To Wear’ because she’s “not trendy and not hip.”  Let’s remember people, Clinton and Stacy help people out but they certainly don’t work miracles.  B*tch is gonna need way more than a new wardrobe to get right.

The first is a big-budget, slickly produced Idol fever dream as told through David Cook’s dreamy eyes, offering just a taste of what life might be like from inside the Rockstar-O-Matic machine. The second spot drops the shiny facade—this is real life we’re dealing with here, after all—and puts us right into the action. It’s our first indication of how things might play out with this season’s Unknown Judging Quantity Kara DioGuardi, as she bolsters the Paula Abdul-led Team in a heated debate over the fate of a bikini-clad, brunette Brooke Hogan-alike. How she managed to get her hands on a golden ticket to Hollywood isn’t entirely clear, though we find ourselves already pulling for the contestant—if only for the slim chance that she might make it to the final twelve.

“It all starts when the Springfield mall gets its very own Mapple store, “it’s so sterile,” gasps Lisa upon entering. Perhaps the best exchange comes from Bart’s dubbing of a Steve Mobs’ product announcement in front of a crowd of gaping nerds, “You think you’re cool because you buy a $500 phone with a picture of a fruit on it. Well guess what? They cost 8 bucks to make and I pee on every one!” A Mapple store employee then angrily responds, “Who dares question the boss we fired 10 years ago and then brought back!”